Esme Prince‘s attacks on Portia Robinson, played by Tabyana Ali, were child’s play compared to the real-life bullying Ali has faced from online detractors. Now, the General Hospital actress is speaking out about the toll that cyber-attacks have taken on her mental well-being.

When They Go Low

Ali wrote a first-person essay for Deadline to share her journey on what it was like to land her GH role and what occurred afterwards, which forced her to strengthen her mental health.

“When I first booked General Hospital, I was so grateful and appreciative,” Ali began. “It felt like the world aligned so perfectly. I auditioned for Trina when I was 16 years old. I made it to the producer session with Sydney Mikayla and two other girls and Sydney booked the role. She did an amazing job with it and made Trina such a lovable fan favorite.

“Then, three years later, I auditioned for General Hospital again,” the actress continues. “I thought they were going to add an addition to Trina’s circle, like a family member or a new friend, but after getting a callback, going to the screen test, and booking the show, I found out in the script that the role I booked was for Trina. It was cool and surreal. When I was younger, I wanted to show that I could do more than just comedy and General Hospital has given me that opportunity.

“No one told me I had to maintain a social media presence, but in this era of the industry it certainly feels like there’s an unspoken expectation to maintain a presence,” Ali muses. “Social media allows you to help build your brand while giving fans an opportunity to relate to you by sharing a glimpse of your life.

“I first found out about the trolls from another cast member who was sharing their own experience with online bullying and explaining why they have their social media platforms set up the way they do,” the performer says. “Eventually I got my own taste of it. It started out with the small things at first but got progressively worse and eventually resulted in racially charged and life-threatening comments that were incredibly hurtful and damaging.

She Goes High

“At first, I didn’t pay them much attention,” Ali says. “These people didn’t know me, and I didn’t know them, so their comments didn’t hold any value. But eventually I started having self-esteem issues that led me to start questioning my self-worth. I would see comments suggesting that because I’m Black, I’m not as attractive as my on-screen counterparts and that I shouldn’t be in in an interatrial relationship. They said that my value and talent didn’t compare.”

“The most obvious advice that I would give other actors is if you come across hate DO NOT take it personally. DO NOT give them your power by accepting what they say,” Ali states. “PLEASE feel your feelings because you are human and that’s one of the most important parts of getting through hurt, BUT remember you are more than a social media comment. Being in this industry you’ve probably heard a lot of ‘No’s,’ and felt a lot of rejection, so this is just another simple storm that will make you stronger. Don’t stoop to their level. That’s what haters want. Don’t give them the satisfaction.” Check out Deadline to read Ali’s essay in full.