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To say Trina has had a hard year on General Hospital is an understatement and trying to move on after Spencer was presumed dead, well, it hasn’t been easy for her. Tomorrow, in the July 19, episode, she is going to get a reminder of how empty her life is without him in it.

Tabyana Ali chatted with Soap Opera Digest to preview what’s ahead and how Trina’s grief will be brought back front and center when she comes across something from her life with Spencer.

As viewers know, Trina and Josslyn moved in together and when the latter shows her BFF what fell out of her belongings during the move, the reminder “breaks her a little bit.” It’s the turtle dove figurine that Spencer gave Trina, which leads her to vent her frustrations over the loss.

“It feels like it’s hard for her to build herself back up when things keep seeming so familiar, like Spencer is still around or he’s still near and it feels like he’s always trying to talk to her in some form of fashion,” Ali shared then explained that Trina doesn’t want to forget Spencer or what they had together but rather be able to get through one day where she doesn’t feel guilty for his death.

“There’s a guilt that comes around being alive, I believe, when the person that you love isn’t,” Ali stated. “Especially in Trina’s case, where she feels like he sacrificed his life for her. There is an immense amount of guilt behind that.”

Even though she’s trying hard to move forward without him, the survivor’s guilt comes back every time little reminders of Spencer pop up around her. And even after months, Trina feels as though her grief isn’t getting any easier, which leads Joss to reflect on her own past and relay to her friend that the grief never goes away. And this ends up upsetting Trina…

“Trina is annoyed when she says that,” Ali relayed. “Right after, she’s like, ‘Well, thanks a lot Joss! Thank you for just rubbing that in my face. I wish you would just lie to me and tell me that everything’s going to be okay!’ Trina is like, ‘I don’t even care if it’s true or not — lie to me and tell that it’s gonna be fine, lie to me and tell me that this will go away, lie to me and tell me that this won’t always be as painful.’ ”

Anyone who has lost someone knows that time does heal… It doesn’t minimize the loss, it just allows us to learn to carry our grief with us on a daily basis and though soaps don’t allow for a long grieving process before setting up a character with a new love inertest, Ali is appreciative that the ABC soap is allowing Trina this time…

“‘Sprina’ fan deep. They were very rooted. They were soulmates,” she expressed. “So you can’t rush something like that, you can’t just get over it quickly. This is something that builds and it takes time to get over, to visually see your soulmate die.”

The actress then addressed how she would deal with such a loss in the real world — and how she would need so many years to adjust afterwards, let alone entertain the thought of being with someone else.

One thing that has come from Spencer’s death is that Trina has stayed connected to others who loved him too, like Laura. They’ve been able to lean on each other, which, as Ali reflected, “Builds a beautiful bond.”